Black Lives Matter

It is as simple as that. Black Lives Matter. If you feel the need to add some caveat— all lives matter, blue lives matter too— then I challenge you to sit with your inherent racism. You have not yet worked hard enough to unpack your bias and privilege, and you are causing harm to members of your community.

We must have gratitude for each person of color who is igniting the spark of this change in the world right now. If we want to exist in a true “land of the free and home of the brave” then we must honor each person of color who holds a spark to light the path forward. With marginalized communities as our guide, may the United States of America become free from inherent racism and may all its citizens become brave enough to confront their internal biases as they arise.

I just typed “one human family” into the image search, and the first three pages were all images of white families, white babies, a white mother and father holding hands with their two little ones… Even in the Unsplash archives, white people are given inherent privilege. It was, in fact, incredibly challenging to find even one image of not-white hands together, and none of those photos were multicolored in nature. Unfortunately, this seems so reflective of American culture at this time.Sure, YOU probably didn’t do anything to cause these biases. Most well-meaning people celebrate their lack of racism (while overlooking their lack of action) and move forward in their lives without much thought to the underprivileged populations that they unconsciously navigate around.The real measure of culpability comes not with being a cause of inequity, but with being a force for change in this world. If you have not prioritized locally owned businesses of color, taken action to ensure that your black friends and family members (do you have any black friends and family members?) are celebrated and properly compensated for their successes, or spoken to your white friends and family members about the ways that they too may be perpetuating racism through unconscious bias, then you are falling short.

With all the focus on people of color, it can be easy to overlook what white people consistently bring to the table: mental illness, entitlement, and an unprecedented amount of hate crimes as only a few of our “redeeming” qualities. While many people would like to paste a smile over the undeniable atrocities committed by white individuals, recent statistics published in November 2019 showed that 65% of all individually perpetrated terrorist activities in the United States were committed by white offenders.

Now is the time that white people need to sit, still and silent, in their own discomfort. White people need to truly be present with their searing, heart breaking pain at the state of the world. White people need to feel deeply the disappointment and disgust that they have within— the ways that their own behaviors have unconsciously (or consciously) perpetuated racism and division in our world.Until white people can do that— be totally at peace with this incredible discomfort— white people can not effectively disrupt the systems within them that perpetuate division.If it helps you to believe that all of the pain and discomfort you are feeling is the inherited, unprocessed trauma of your white ancestors, then so be it. “Hurt people hurt people” as the old adage goes, so imagine the gutwrenching torment that must live in the minds and hearts of people who are actively enslaving individuals, eradicating culture with force, and demanding to be seen as higher than all others in status. I imagine that there are some classifications within the Diagnostic Statistics Manual for people who display those characteristics, these days. Justification is a far easier processes than the grief that comes along with openly acknowledging that you have caused a deep harm. We are here now because nobody before us has been able to sit with and process the absolute terror that has been coded into white ancestors’ DNA, or make reparations for the way that this terror has been displaced upon people of color for generations. In fact, we are still learning how to confront these terrors: the current resident of our whitest house still actively enslaves people of color, allowing their babies to die in cages, while speaking out in support of openly admitted White Supremacists. For as long as our country continues to allow elected officials of our “United States” to behave in this manner, all white people are united in the blame.Silence your narrative, your stories of personal injustice, and the ways that you have achingly tried (and failed) to be an ally in the past. This is not your time to speak of your own discomfort. This is your time to transform your discomfort into functional action. This is the time to honor our siblings of color in this one Human family by using all of our power to create action for their voices, perpetually unheard within our White House. Find stillness in your lack of comfort and instead use all of your strength to amplify and act for the voices of the marginalized around you.

You can do it, I believe in you.

So, say it aloud: Black Lives Matter. Black lives have been carrying the burden of our culture for generations— building our esteemed institutions with their sweat and blood, receiving the rape and torture of our demented white forefathers so that our grandmothers could find some sense of abatement, and all while enhancing our lives with love and compassion in countless multiplicities of ways.If you would call yourself an ally, then say it aloud: Black Lives Matter. To respond to a friend saying “I am really struggling” with the statement “we are all really struggling” is dismissive and callous, only perpetuating the pain and division that is so achingly needing to be addressed. Be a true friend: “Yes, you are struggling, yes, I see you, yes, you matter.” So say it aloud: Black Lives Matter. And then silence yourself, because beyond that your actions will speak louder than any words.